When your child does something that you want them to do more of, you tell them that they’ve done a good job, and tell them why.
What’s Happening Here?
“One of the currencies that children run on is Attention; they’ll do anything for attention. So, if you can give them attention when they do something that you want –you have to be sharp, you have to be consciously attempting to do this– then you can facilitate that movement into responsibility happily.
“There is nothing more powerful than focused, attentive, precise reward. That is not ‘every-child-wins-a-trophy-day.’ You watch and you see when the child has done something that pushes them beyond their current limit. You say, ‘good job, kid. We could see a lot more of that – way to be!’ And then they’re beaming away thrilled about the situation.”
–Dr. Jordan B. Peterson